UM, sorry please stop immediately and read this article through.
It’s a real problem guys, and it needs to stop. Double-standards are absolute shit. Why do we focus in on funny womens’ looks? A point that stood out in the piece to me was the fact that these women ARE the stars of their own shows—that should count for something. The jokes they deliver are FUNNY. They aren’t playing the quirky girlfriend in most instances, they are the LEADS. No one feels compelled to talk about how fucking weird James Spader looks (love him PS), they care about how FUNNY he is. Why is that different when it comes to women?
I was going to type “fuck Hollywood” but in all seriousness, fuck these female catty writers.
“Why is it nearly impossible for women, even journalists, to talk about other women without bringing up looks? I don’t know. But I do have a solution. Stop talking about women’s looks in articles that have nothing to do with women’s looks. I did it. I didn’t once mention the looks of Torie Bosch or Alessandra Stanley. I wrote about how shitty they were to other women in their articles without once mentioning anything about what they look like. I didn’t even Google Image search them. I promise It’s possible to talk about the merits of a woman’s creative work without talking about how weird her hair is or how much her butt weighs. All it takes is retraining your brain to stop being a superficial dick.”- Erin Gibson
This is a very important read, and I am surprised I haven’t seen it re-blogged even more on my dashboard.
Reading this made me cry, and then cry in my husbands arms. It really opened up a flood gate of emotions. We are too hard on ourselves because we try to look good for others because the media fucking sucks a dick, and then that makes us all suck a dick.
I don’t wear make up very often, and one of the main reasons is because when I do, I hear “oh you put on make-up, you look so pretty.” And I HEAR THIS FROM WOMEN. Guess what, I look pretty with out make-up, and guess what, so do you. I’m not saying I am anti-make-up. I think there is something fun about putting on a bold colored lipstick or a dramatic eye shadow. I just don’t like it when people use it to cover up and hide their natural true beauty.
We all need to embrace ourselves for who we are, stop changing ourselves to please others. Stop feeling shame for something that you can’t help and that again, is normal and natural. Zits happen to all of us, don’t feel shame. Stretch marks are a natural thing, don’t feel shame. We are all different shapes and sizes, don’t feel shame. Be proud of who you are and be good to yourself because you want to be good to yourself, not so that someone else will be more comfortable looking at you. Fuck those people.
I could write a 50 million page essay on my thoughts, but I just want you to read Ashley Judd’s for now, because her words are very powerful and important. Share this with your sisters, daughters, mothers, fathers, sons, brothers and friends.
Be yourself.
Forever yours in jeans, t-shirts, sneakers & messy hair,
Shannon O’Neill
<3
Nailed it.
How does this symbolize constraints on girls and women, and encroach on our right to be simply as we are, at any given moment?
I had a conversation with my roommate once about how I don’t like when people say they like you because “you’re different.” I couldn’t explain why I felt this without sounding like I either (a) never wanted to be different, or (b) hated all compliments. But Ashley Judd’s quote gets at it. If someone labels you as that “different girl” it’s not the same as just being “different.” “Different” I can handle and embrace. Really. But we’re still at a stage such that being that girl that doesn’t do X, even though other girls do X, makes you “different” and that “means something” to this person who’s labeling you. But you’re a PERSON, with changing opinions and tastes and moods, so labeling you different because you like punk or wear sneakers or cut your hair off or hate makeup feels like “positive sexism,” where the “positive” is that the girl is just doing activities men “typically” do (I’m pulling from the term “positive racism” to fit this), and that’s bullshit. So thank you, Ashley Judd, because after a year, I can finally justify why the phrase “you’re so different from other girls” makes my insides crawl.
Also - I’m really loving the ladies of UCB.
kmcg:
When I used to talk about the type of theatre I wanted to make, I was very clear. I wanted to make stuff that was, you know, feministy, but not all about MY VAGINA. I appreciated that ladies had felt the need to scream about their vaginas in punk bands, like Bikini Kill, but I was…
—
Two and a Half Men co-creator Lee Aronsohn’s tells THR he doesn’t much care for lady-centric sitcoms. (via newsweek)
He applauded women like Whitney Cummings, Chelsea Handler and Tina Fey securing a voice to discuss formerly taboo subjects on TV.
“But we’re approaching peak vagina on television, the point of labia saturation,” he added.
The current female TV boom contrasts with Two and a Half Men mostly portraying women as bimbos, something Aronsohn isn’t about to apologize for.
“Screw it… We’re centering the show on two very damaged men. What makes men damaged? Sorry, it’s women. I never got my heart broken by a man,” Aronsohn earlier told the Toronto conference during a keynote address.
(via synecdoche)
Enough gentlemen. I get it. You have:
- sex
- beer
- poker with the guys
- season tickets
- fishing rods
- self-consciousness about your yard
- needing coffee already made when you wake up
- neglecting your kids
- spit-takes
- “no one likes nice guys”
- two-dimensional ways of writing women
(via synecdoche)
Amateur Thoughts on Sticky Comedy
I went to an improv practice session today where I was pegged by my “boyfriend” as an extreme feminist in a scene. I wasn’t thinking hard on it, so a few big tropes definitely slipped out of my mouth during both the first and second beats. Only later did I realize that I should have labeled the game (a.k.a. “the fun thing about the scene”) much differently than I did: I labeled it as “overreacting feminist who uses basic everyday life as extreme examples for an argument” (barf) and should have labeled it as “overreacting ________ who uses basic everyday life as extreme examples for an argument.” This would have (a) put a fresh-er spin on the scenes, as it wasn’t a repeat of dialogue and relationships that are [shockingly] always around us, and (b) given more options for where subsequent beats could have gone. An overreacting vegan who thinks mowing grass is murder, and getting a haircut is decapitation. An overreacting clean freak who thinks atoms are just the tiniest molecular makeup of dirt. ANYTHING.
Alternatively, what I could have done was some big speech, where I broke up with the guy, telling him that I’ve been trying to get him to break up with me the whole time by using opinions held by any person - male or female - that would be annoying, because they defy logic, regardless of the argument being made, and that he was just too caught up in trying to fix me to notice or take a hint. But hey, that’s not very good “yes and-ing,” and I’m also not good enough yet to lie in improv, and certainly not good enough to subvert in it.
So, basically, when you extrapolate this idea to scenes you see about gender roles, sexuality, minorities, etc, you see a lot of shit that people don’t think they think but then they end up saying on stage, because someone shouted out the topic from the audience, and no one knows what to do. Or maybe I just don’t know what to do. But Iknow what I don’t want to do, and that’s that dumb Two and a Half Men thing that made me feel slimy today. Because shit’s tired, and shit’s dumb.
Despite recent arguments to support this article, I was kind of hoping that this wasn’t the truth.
“Research to be published this week in a leading academic journal confirms what many female comics - and funny women - have long suspected: men are frightened by their brand of humour. While men might chuckle at the odd gag, when it comes to finding a long-term companion they do not want a partner who will fire a stream of witty repartee at them, according to the study carried out by academics at some of the world’s top universities.”
The common thread in every single “Why men don’t like [some quality in women]” article/”study” in the history of ever is male dominance. Humor = power. Men want to be the ones with the power. The end.
Mostly, who cares? Because why would you even want to sleep with a man who doesn’t think you’re funny?
(bolded for truth)
- Jane: Well, what's your definition of true?
- Daria: Something that says something.
- Jane: What, anything?
- Daria: No, something, about something.
- Jane: Let me get this straight, you're telling me that you want to write something, not just anything, that says something about something.
- Daria: Right.
- Jane: Gee, who'd ever believe you having trouble communicating.
Alyson once told me that I should write things down when I’m in a positive mood, instead of what I usually do, which is writing things down while I’m feeling supah-shittay. And here we are!
I saw improv with a friend today. Before the show started, there was a woman in the group who looked ridiculously familiar, like someone I saw at the Asian American Writer’s Workshop back in April. But I wasn’t positive so I didn’t say anything at first. We kept sort of looking at each other, so I finally said something. “Did you attend an AAWW workshop? I did stand-up there.” Her eyes instantly flashed with recognition and relief. “I knew you looked familiar!” It turns out she was the woman who went on right after I did. She said some really nice things about my act (selfishselfishselfish), and encouraged me to do it again and do some free workshops. An awesome way to start the evening.
The show itself was good - not the greatest, but I felt oddly inspired by it. Since the theater was on the shabbier side, it was easy to feel close to the performers, and I felt like I could see them thinking. Normally that would take me out of it, but today it humanized them, and made me think that they’re all still learning and trying new stuff out, just like anybody else.
(And they were all female. Ladies night!)
“I’m Gene Parmesan. How you doing?”
My favorite episode.
can you hear the squeal in your head? i certainly can.
